Thursday, March 28, 2013

Epiphany or Revelation...

Epiphany - (1) : a usually sudden manifestation or perception of the essential nature or meaning of something (2) : an intuitive grasp of reality through something (as an event) usually simple and striking (3) : an illuminating discovery, realization, or disclosure
Revelation - (1) a : an act of revealing or communicating divine truth
b : something that is revealed by God to humans
(2) a : an act of revealing to view or making known
b : something that is revealed; especially : an enlightening or astonishing disclosure 

Everyone has had those moments where it feels like a light bulb has went off in your head like the cartoons and it's always when either they are trying to think of a way to get out of something or to get something they want. 

Well all to often I have these epiphany moments where I get a little clarity on issues of the heart. I have a habit of letting things bother me until I dang near crack. Is it healthy or wise to do that? Probably not but the truth of the matter is that I do too much and don't think I don't hear about it from my better half. My DH is the voice of reason when I try to argue with the inevitable. He can be that light switch that preps the actual light bulb to light up. Ok, that may sound crazy to some and I will try my best to explain my analogy. The light switch is flipped, electrical currents flow to deliver a signal, and 'BING' the light bulb shines bright. Sometimes I tend to read too much into certain situations when the answer is quite simple. I wish I didn't do that but the fact remains, it is what it is because I do tend to over-analyze things. Often times we want to find a solution that will benefit everyone but as I have stated before that's not always possible. The only thing I am positive about is that the person that always tries to find the silver lining in a never ending drama situation with issues pulling from every angle is that they will be the ones burned in the end. Left with a bitter taste, a worn out spirit, and physically burnt are the only outcomes that is predestined. 

I was determined never to go back to the complainer that I once was. Recent stressful situations have really tried to test that theory unfortunately. Needless to say my voice of reason was not going to let me fall for that trap and after having a tête-à-tête with the voice, I had to pray for guidance cause I was beyond conflicted. Me personally I'm the type that will wait for a response before I do or at least I try my best to wait it out. To say I didn't have to wait long would be an understatement, the light bulb went off in my head so quick it made me stumble a bit. 

My epiphany moment was when I realized that I am not Superwoman and I can't change or improve everything. Just because I was asked to do something does not mean that I'm obligated to do it. It's okay to say 'no thank you' or 'not this time', it's okay to disappoint some people. They will get over it and if they don't than two peas in a bucket, that's between them and their conscience. Boo-hoo everybody is not always going to be happy with you point-blank-period. 

The revelation came with a solution that should appease my hungry soul, compromise with my creative spirit, and settle my overactive nerves. Will outsiders agree? Probably not but who's problem is that really? That's my story and I'm sticking to it. 


Monday, March 11, 2013


Adjust - 
1. To change so as to match or fit; cause to correspond.
2. To bring into proper relationship.
3. To adapt or conform, as to new conditions: "unable to adjust themselves to their environment" (Karl A. Menninger). See Synonyms at adapt.

Adjusting or adapting to a new feeling, surrounding, situation, etc. can be quite taxing if you are not prepared properly. It's almost like a badly cooked meal if it's not properly prepped. The results can be devastating if you are not an adaptable type of person. By that I mean if you don't adjust well to changes whether they were sudden or purposely. Oftentimes unavoidable surprises and dilemma's present themselves at the most inappropriate time. Those times when an unexpected expense comes up when you already have limited funds, some choose to freak out while others choose to take it as life's unexpected hurdles and just cross it. After all what does stressing about a situation really get a person. Oh yeah I know, a shorter life span, wrinkles, high blood pressure, acne, headaches, and the list could go on forever. What's the point in that?! 

How can one really prepare for LIFE? Is it possible to be prepared for every mishap or hiccup that can occur to throw a person off their path?

My answer is simple, I don't have a freaking clue because I honestly feel I am never properly prepared. I am prepared in certain aspects but mainly I prefer short term goals. Of course I have long term goals too but long term seems so far away. LOL... OK seriously though, life is too short to stress over what is to come. That attitude seems to work out better for me personally. My answer to the second question is, in my opinion no one can ever be prepared for everything. One can try but surprises always pop up when you least expect it. It's like a reality check that things change every day. Just when you think things are going good and you are moving on up like the Jefferson's, some unexpected burden shows it's ugly head to knock you down a few notches. The most important thing is that once you're knocked down is that you get back up. The worst thing that one can do is let whatever the problem is keep them down and do nothing to remedy the problem. 

Life is an upward battle, you gotta put in the proper effort in order to continue to fight through the obstacles thrown in the way. 

Be Blessed folks... I'm a work in progress, what about you? 

Deuces ~Nika~ 

Friday, March 1, 2013

Conflict Vs. Compromise

Conflict -
A serious disagreement or argument, typically a protracted one: "the eternal conflict between the sexes".

Compromise -
An agreement or a settlement of a dispute that is reached by each side making concessions.

Often times things or situations become played out like eight tracks. I know that's a very cliche saying but it's true more times than not. So what are we to do about the played out or outdated things? Well the smart thing to do would be to change the order, the outcome, or who is involved. Basically the keyword would be change. Everyday people young and old complain about this or complain about that. I must admit I was once a guilty participant in the pity city committee. The pity city committee is pretty much self explanatory. Something goes wrong and instead of taking the blame for my part in the messed up situation, I find what else was wrong and throw the focus there. All while relishing in the pity given from outsiders telling me it's gonna be alright or better yet the pity I consumed myself in. You know the saying, "Wallowing in self-pity." It took years to come to the conclusion that nothing was ever going to be alright unless I first figured out what the problem was, prayed for guidance to solve the problem, and then proceed to come up with solutions to fix the problem even if that required removing myself from the equation entirely. So the question of today is, DUN DUN DUNNNNNN.....

Why produce or deal with conflict when the obvious answer is to propose a compromise?

Now if that doesn't work then it's obvious that everybody doesn't have good intentions towards problem solving. What is so wrong with things changing especially for the good? Good changes promote healthy growth. Everybody is not out to kill, steal, and destroy. Only one entity has the ability to do something so heartless because that's his entire goal. It's known that some people are set in their ways and absolutely despise change but my main question is WHY? These people don't want to try anything new whether its food, songs, dances, adventures, and that list could go on forever. That just sounds plain dang BORING. Who wants to live like that? Certainly not me...

As I've stated in previous blogs my complaint-o-meter is out of service and I've officially moved out of pity city. If its something that's bothering me I'm in the business of figuring out what can be done about it to make it better and should I remove myself completely to avoid further strain. Compromising to appease those who dislike change is where most parties of conflict end up because nine times out of ten somebody if not everybody involved may not have any intentions on budging. It sucks huge ones but the fact remains is that it happens.

As the slogan for my church goes, "Change is free" but to add on to that statement that already speaks volumes, "How much does conflict and never ending drama cost?" If you dig a little deeper or better yet dig way below the surface area, you could possibly see that those negatives can cost you the important things in life. Friends, family, job, money, and most importantly respect. 

That is all for today folks. Of course I will be back soon with some other thoughts but I feel it's inappropriate to connect the thoughts of the two subject matters that's on my mind today. To all who stay up on current events of Literary Essence will be thoroughly entertained, well everybody that's open-minded will enjoy. On that note, I'LL HOLLA!!!

Much Love ~Nika~