Reflections - careful thought, especially the process of reconsidering previous actions, events, or decisions
"As I look back over my life, I can see how your love has guided me..." Those are the words to the beginning of one of my favorite gospel songs because it truly explains how truly blessed I have been even when I didn't realize or recognize it. I always complained about this and complained about that. This wasn't right, I wasn't being treated fairly, life isn't fair, womp womp womp... Now that I relect back that's all I did was complain. But as the song says, as I look back over my life, honestly I can see how much God truly loved me because he brought me through those many complicated trials of my life. When my faith wasn't as strong as it should have been, he still never gave up on me. Truth be told I am not a bible-slinger, verse-spitter, holier than thou holy roller by any means. I know I have a long way to go and I know I will never be perfect, that's not the way of the world. But in that same thought I recognize the good in me as well as the bad, I acknowledge my short comings, I repent for my sins, and I thank God for the many blessings he pours out big or small. I may not have it all but one thing I am extremely grateful for is the many people around me that pray for my success versus those who wait for my demise. They already know who they are, so there's no need to name names. Just know I thank God everyday for you all.
NOW MOVING FORWARD FROM THE MUSHY STUFF....... I just had to get that out. I wasn't intending on going there but my fingers started moving and I just let it go.
Back to reflections...
After reflecting over the past and the many signs that I possibly missed because I was not confident enough to step out on faith. I see the great things that are to come, I feel it in my heart and soul that what's to come is beyond exceptional. What's to come for my family and I is beyond our wildest dreams. I just hate that it took me so long to come to this realization that I am capable of big things and skilled in many ways. I'm not conceited by any means and I have been told that "I am talented." I always frowned on that phrase mainly because I hate the spotlight. I like to wade in the background, it's my personality. True enough some that know me know that I can be loud as all get up and show plum out at times. But in all actuality that's only in a comfortable family/friend's setting. When put on the spot in front of other's, I freeze faster than skin touching dry ice. NOT GOOD!!! Obviously that fear is something I will eventually have to get over with the many different titles that I currently bear.
In reflecting on the past-present, I fully accept and embrace all that is to come. I will adapt, I will always at least put my best foot forward, and I will continue to keep my faith.
Loving me and all that comes with me... MUCH LOVE ~Nika~